How To Catch a 'BOB'
Before you can begin to prepare your tasty Bob dishes, you must first *HAVE* a Bob... one might ask, "How Do I Catch My Bob?" Well, If you are wondering that, you've come to the right place!
Here We (EvanRoo) will teach you step by step how to catch, clean and cook your Bob!
Definition of a 'BOB' : A 'BOB' Is Not a person, a BOB is a thing, no one knows for sure what a BOB actually is, it's just a BOB. There are Male and Female BOBs, and they live in all kinds of places all over the world.
The Best place to catch a "BOB" is ofton, the Mall-a-caus, AKA The Mall. You must, first, have the right equiptment for the job! a stirdy rope (bob's can be strong, and mean!), a club for thoes pesky Bob's that will not hold still, a "gag" to put in your Bob's mouth, some Bob's are also very nosie, the Gag is ofton nessicary, Duct Tape also works well. And you will need some thing to loor your Bob with, Food works best, if it's a male Bob, a nice female can ofton attract your bob, if it's a female bob, a male can oftoon attrace it! But, Still, Food *IS* the best mothid of capture. Depending on your area, depends on the type of food you will want to use,... but usually a : Pot Roast, Mashed Potatoes, With Gravy, and A Side of Green Beans works very well!
Ok! Now that you have all your equiptment, you need to try and attract a BOB.
Start by setting the Pot Roast out at a Mall-A-Caus... Set a Sign "FREE TO ALL BOB'S" on it, You might also want to 'fan' the pot roast smell around to help attract more BOBs. And Wate paitently behind a Mall-a-caus bush or shrub. Once a BOB takes the bate tie them up with the rope, and gag them. You might need help carrying your catch off, so you might want to bring a friend along to help you with the preperation and catching.
The Next best way to catch you BOB is to look in the Forest... There are LOTS of BOBS in the forrest,.. you just have to look in the right place. You Ofton find BOBs Hunting, The Hunter-Gatherer BOB is more delectable then the Lazy-Shelp BOB, HUNTER-GATERER BOB is a lot leaner, and has more taste, but is also a lot harder to catch. The LAZY-SHELP BOB, is fatter, has less taste and is tough to work with, but eayser to catch, they can usually be run down on foot, where as the HUNTER-GATHERER BOB, you usually have to trap.
Your best chance of catching a BOB in the forrest is to look for caves, BOBs generally live in caves, thou, they have also been knowan to live in trees. BOBs Do Not Fly (thank heavens!) So you should not have any problems with aireal assult. You need to bet a BOB-trap close to the entrance of the Cave. The Best BOB-Trap is usually, a dangling ham, or a pot-roats, with a "trip" the BOB steps inthe rope to get the Ham or Pot-Roast and *BAM* the rope tightins around the ancles of our BOB, FLINGING him threw the air, and usually, rendering him unconcious. Then it's easy to bound your BOB and bring him home.
The Next Best Place To Catch A BOB is at the Beach, Now Beach-Bobs are more salty then forest Bobs, but they are also not as gamey. Beach Bobs are a little eayser to catch cause they dont have as many hiding places as Forest Bobs do. the Best way to catch a Beach-Bob is to set a 'box-tap' kinda like a rabbit box, only on a much larger scale.
Back To The Kitchen For More Bob Recpies!